Inauguration..!!

“Arjun…Arjunnnnn….. hey idiot Arjunnnn…….” I heard at 7 in the morning as my alarm clock had exhausted it’s battery life. As usually I was in the US, sightseeing with Mr. Obama. I mean I was in my dreams. “Abeee Oyeeeeee” someone screamed again.

“Who the hell is that nut head??” I wondered, rolled and dived like an Olympic Gold medalist into the ground bruising my forehead over the floor. I stood up rubbing my head to realize that I was in my bed room and my trip was over. In other words, the night was over.

“Dabba nan magane (useless fellow)…Arjunnnnnnn…” I heard again. I walked to the front door and opened it to find Roshan with his jogging gear on.

“Hi da, what’s up?” I asked which pissed him off like crazy.

“Bloody damn ass. We decided to go jogging today… Don’t you remember?

“Did we? Isn’t it late now? Can we go now?” I enquired in an American accent.

“Yes We Can” he announced like Mr.Obama.

I walked back still rubbing my eyes convincing myself that I was awake now and I was in India. I too put on my jogging gear on, banged the door behind me and said to Roshan who was tying his shoe laces- “Don’t delay man. This is what I hate about you.”
He found a stone and pelted at me. Anyway, we finally hit the road, jogging along towards the park. As we jogged along, we discussed matters varying from national issues like- “If it was NIKE or REEBOK that was pelted at our Home minister” to local issues like- “The best Bunking strategy for the next day’s class.” He then noticed a street dog to his right and hence immediately shifted his position to the left of me. Anyway, we jogged along talking about this and that, though we were occasionally distracted by either very good looking girls or either very bad ones.

As the jogging had come to a halt and we were both puffing with our hands on our knees, we found a huge gathering a few meters ahead of us. The banner said- “Inauguration Of Nirmala Public Toilet.”
At first we thought, Mrs. Nirmala was the owner of this toilet, but then realized that ‘Nirmala’ meant ‘Clean’and not a name. As we read further we learnt that it will be inaugurated by a local MLA. And the most exciting and funny part was that free breakfast would be served after the inauguration. I was picturing a scene on my mind where Roshan runs to the toilet and asks- Is the breakfast ready?



Roshan who was standing with his eyes fixed to the newly built public toilet was lost in thoughts. I dint want to disturb him, so went to check out as to what was getting prepared for breakfast. Nice hot Kesari Bath was getting ready and I returned to Roshan to convey the good news. Roshan still stood staring at the public toilet as if he was staring at an ex-girl friend who’d ditched him. He finally, slowly turned to me and said with a low voice- “Dude, now I really need to go to the toilet.”

“Just by seeing a toilet??”

“Yeah man. That’s my weakness.”

“How tragic!!”

“I’m going in. Urgent” he said and walked towards it. People were tying the ribbon which the MLA was supposed to cut for the inauguration. He pushed a 10 rupee note to a cleaner and entered the toilet from under the ribbon. Meanwhile I walked to the dining area and enquired as to when the breakfast will be ready. Meanwhile, the MLA had arrived and Roshan was still inside the White-House. I climbed a nearby compound wall and watched the scene.

The MLA cut the ribbon and a loud round of applauds made its way. Just then, with ultimate grace, like in a fashion show, Mr.Roshan was seen walking out from inside and everyone looked with their eye brows hooked in amazement. The MLA gaped astonishingly and disgustingly at him in confusion. Roshan mustered a shameless smile and even more shamelessly said- “ Nice Toilet” smiled and hurried out like a sheep.

Anyway, finally we had the Kesari Bath and coffee after which I had to visit the White-House. Later, as we were ready to leave, I announced- “We have just ‘inaugurated’ a public toilet in the true sense of the word. I’m proud.”

31 comments:

  Creation

April 13, 2009 at 4:43 PM

ROFLMAO!!

What a situation to find oneself in!!

Yes, you inaugurated it in the truest sense of the word!

Did he actually say "Nice toilet"?

It must have been quite a sight!

Hahah

By the way, I've been visiting your blog for quite sometime noe. blogrolled you! :)

  Pretty Me!!

April 13, 2009 at 4:51 PM

So finally Mr. Humor got the time to post !! kool !!! loved it !!! surely made me laugh out LOUD :D !! write on :)

  Arjun

April 13, 2009 at 4:54 PM

@Creation

hehe.. Thanks for droppin by yaa....
n all i write is fiction with just a tinge of real life experiences :P

Yeah.. The fact that we had inaugurated a toilet was for real... I'm Proud of Myself hehehe

  Arjun

April 13, 2009 at 4:56 PM

@Pratsieeee.. ;)


I somehow made up my mind to write something today... Wrote this in a hurry... but yeah.. something better than nothing types.. hehe

  Meera

April 13, 2009 at 5:02 PM

Ha...as usual a great one!

  яノςんム

April 13, 2009 at 5:24 PM

ROFL!!

Nirmala toilet..
and food at the inauguration of a toilet.. i cant see a reason how cud u stay back to eat.... :P

hehe and inagurating a toilet in tru sense.. i am rolling laughing literally..

yeah see.. u make us laugh so muc. y wudnt we miss u??? ;)

  nan

April 13, 2009 at 5:24 PM

“We have just ‘inaugurated’ a public toilet in the true sense of the word. I’m proud.”

Whatta write annays :P he he
Proud of u and Roshan :P

  Arjun

April 13, 2009 at 5:42 PM

@nandini

hehe.. yeah.. I'm proud.. hehehe

Thanks chells ;)

  Arjun

April 13, 2009 at 5:44 PM

@Rich...

hehe.. enjoyed uh.!! kool..

its maybe becos u missed me that u r laughing now.. hehe...

my stupid philosophy.. anyway..
thnks Richa..!! :)

Cheers..!!
Arjun

  Thoorika

April 13, 2009 at 8:32 PM

Lolz!! Nice toilet?! He actually said that?! :D

  joie de vivre

April 14, 2009 at 10:21 AM

hehe...
inaugration se pehle hi :P

it happens only in INDIA

  spicymist

April 14, 2009 at 12:00 PM

hey im trying to imagine that MLa;s resume >> social work : inauguration of Nirmala Public Toilet. :)) YOu people can cry foul! saying ' liar, WE inaugurated the toilet, u just cut the ribbon' :P

  Nyx

April 14, 2009 at 1:11 PM

:P
:P
:P

Super da daiiiii.... honestly!!

Hehehe...Nirmala... What a friend!! He has a tendency to go to the white-house as soon as he sees it!!

Lol...
Good one RJ, laughed out loud at it actually! :)

Cheers

*PEACE*

  Akansha Agrawal

April 14, 2009 at 1:59 PM

ROFL... hehe :D it's got humour dripping all over... this is what you write when you are in a hurry :O May you stay in a hurry all your life... :P ;)

Inaugurating a toilet... waah! must be a beautiful sensation... :P

  Gazafi Saif

April 14, 2009 at 3:22 PM

damn funny inauguration of a toilet :-))..

  Arjun

April 14, 2009 at 8:37 PM

@ joiedevivre

hehe.. yeah...!! true...!! wit ppl like me.. :P

@spicymist

Yeha da.. exactly..!! hehe... I told na.. I'm so proud.. hehe.. :)

  Arjun

April 14, 2009 at 8:41 PM

@Ariii

hehehe... madam sirichangoooooooo... hoi hoi...hehe

Thnks da.. ;)

@Akansha

hehehe.. Akss..!! :P

such kinda stories i can write anytime ya.. wats there in this..uh.. hehe

A hurried Thank u to u :P

@saif

oyee saif bhaiii..!! Thank u.. :) :)

  Priyanka

April 14, 2009 at 11:06 PM

Hehe…wow..another gud one of yours..!! I m here aftr a long time…but I didn’t cum coz I thot u didn’t post anything! :P …..U ought to tell me personally fan!! ;)
I havnt read d post below dis one too….n havnt read midnight utopia too! Good..i m happy…stuff to read! Yey! :D

Dis post..funny as usual!! As usual in US, sightseeing with Mr. Obama..hehe…n yes we can..lol..
Aur vo…shoe throwing…fan…I had d same que when I saw it on TV…maine to shoe dekhte hi bola…nike hai!! :P
National n local issues..!! bunking! *proud* ;)

Write more frequently!

  Saket Ranjan

April 14, 2009 at 11:49 PM

So u finally get time to write something. Have been waiting for this and as always you do not disappoint. And why the hell were you with Mr. Obama and not Angelina Jolie or even Sarah Palin. Man,in dreams you can have anyone as your tour guide.

BTW, was the food specially prepared so that anyone would feel like taking a sightseeing tour of the place where they were having breakfast?

Plzz don't take long and keep us waiting for so long for ur next post.

  lachu

April 15, 2009 at 7:41 AM

u r crazy man!!!!!!!!!!! wit crazy ideas!!!!!!!!!:P
cheers
lachu

  Arjun

April 15, 2009 at 10:22 AM

@fan

hehe... Priyanka madam was busy.... So the posts went un-noticed.. :P hehe..

hehe fan.. i for real get such drms ya.. like i'll be sight seeing with the american president.. dont kno wats behind it.. :P

oooo.. so it's NIKE??? I'm proud of u fan *wiping away tears of joy*... U r the best fan i can ever get.. :P

and yes.. have implemented the 'local' issues today... All ur blessings.. ;)

Thank u fan..!! :)

  Arjun

April 15, 2009 at 10:28 AM

@Saket

yeah man. finally wrote it.. was competing with our politicians as to who is the busier person... :P :P

Angelina and Sarah uh?? My gf's reading this blog da.... My throat is working fine till date n i want it to remain that way.. :P lol..

There's something between me and the american presidents... I guess i was an american president in my previous birth or sumthin'.... hehe.. sry for bein stupid..

abt the food.. hehe.. that wld be so apt.. ;)

Thnk u man.. I'll try to post soon next time... I lost the competition.. am not as busy as our politicians.. :(

Cheers..!!
Arjun

  Arjun

April 15, 2009 at 10:30 AM

@lachu

*bows down*.. *accepts the bouquet*.... *eyes become moist*... *blowing my nose* .. thank u.. thank u so much.. :P :P

dai loose.. :P

Cheers..!!
Arjun

  uchiha teee

April 15, 2009 at 3:38 PM

hehe , nice 1; inaugurated in the true sense lol !

  Matangi Mawley

April 15, 2009 at 9:51 PM

tht was hillarious!!!!!!! esp: "inauguration in its true sense"... gr8!

  Misty Rhythm

April 15, 2009 at 10:28 PM

lol i'm curious...which part was fiction?...:)
luved it as always :)

  Arjun

April 16, 2009 at 9:44 AM

@Tej

Thnk ya.. ;)

@Matangi

Hey.. longtime.. :) Hw u been doin??
Thnks.... :)

@Neha

The inauguration part and that we had inaugurated in d truest sense of the word was real... the story around it was fictional... hehe... ;)

Glad that u like it.. :)

Cheers..!!
Arjun

  sunny_raju

April 18, 2009 at 10:06 AM

Hey and the label says partly fiction so whts not fiction in this? Eager to know! ;)
LOL Nice blog

  Adeline

May 4, 2009 at 1:06 AM

its damn humorous!inaugurating the White house in the true sense :P lolz

  Shruti

May 15, 2009 at 11:30 PM

:-O
:)) ROFL!! This really happened! oooo.. can't even imagine how silly Roshan must've felt there.. LOL!! This is soo soooo funny =))

  ASR

May 19, 2009 at 7:28 PM

really appreciate ur humour sense