Midnight Utopia..!!

“Sonaaaaliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii………………” I screamed as the clock struck 3 in the morning, in my hostel room.

Sensing that I was still asleep, Roshan brought a jug full of water and poured it on me. Drowned with water and shock, I tried to sit, trying to catch my breath and thoughts as the water entered my nostrils. That bastard could have just sprinkled water on me.

“Oh God! What kind of a mad ass are you?” Roshan asked restlessly feeling helpless about me- the enigma.

“Same to you.” I smiled and blasted- “Go get the towel you stupid.”

As he passed the towel to me, he said with ineffable restlessness- “ You literally kill me with your dreams everyday. How many tonnes of crap do you have loaded into that useless head of yours?”

I was recollecting my dream without even renting out an ear to his ‘woe blabbering’. I said interrupting him- “ Okay listen to my dream” and began with the unvarnished version of the mid-night crap-

The sky encircled me with dark, gray clouds. I clad a white shirt with a white dhoti in a pukka South Indian village style. A tall, black guy stood facing me around 10 metres from me with a stare, a forest of a moustache and a knife in his hand. With his other hand, he held my girlfriend, Sonali's throat. I looked at my slippers and then at the sky, removed my sunglasses and flipped it aside. The first drop of rain reached my forehead, which ignited my show of bravery and man-ness. With a tough look on my face I lifted my right leg as if to show him my thighs. Then I lifted my right hand and slapped hard on my right thigh and just as I slapped the thigh, a loud thunder broke out and the downpour began. With that, the guy trembled with fear, released the girl and ran for his life. Sonali ran to me and hugged me and was about to kiss when the director hurriedly shouted- “CUT. Take Okay.”

I added to Roshan, who was with his ears open to my preposterous dream story, cleaning all the excess water on the floor after he had poured it on me- “ Dude, the damn director. I was reminded of our guru, Navjot Singh Sidhu’s saying- “ The ball missed the bat just like a kiss in an Indian movie.”



‘Crap-disinterested Mr. Roshan enquired- “ And you shouted Sonaaliii for that?”

“No, you stupid.” I continued- “ That’s after another scene in the movie.”

“Fuck You.”

“Thank You.”

Unlike Roshan, I was excited, so I continued- “ And you know what? I won the Indian equivalent of ‘The Oscars’ – ‘The Bhaskars’ for this role. You ever got such a dream in you lifetime?”

“Thank God. No.”

Roshan, in pursuit of time-pass, asked out of curiosity- “ What was that next part which made you shout so loud like Tarzan?”

I smiled and started-

I paid 100 bucks for a bunch of flowers, which costs just 50 bucks and began to run to the railway station. Though there were taxis all around, I had to confine myself to running. My sweat and tears merged confusingly as I sped across the city like a thief who stole flowers. My informers (a bunch of comedians) had informed me that Sonali’s dad (the villain by the way) was taking her away from me to an unknown place. The train began it’s movement as I reached the station entrance. I dint care to buy a platform ticket but ran, jumping around like Jackie Chan. The train was speeding away from the platform when I spotted Sonali from the train extending a hand towards me with tears flowing through her like a waterfall. I ran and ran, but the train was faster and I couldn’t reach her. Now my 100 bucks worth flowers and my life was totally wasted. So I waited for the next train to enter the platform, and as it came along, I jumped in front of it shouting out loud- “ Sonaaaliiiiiiiiiiii…..”

It was 6 in the morning now, Roshan scratched his head after listening to my story and walked into the bathroom to get ready for college. Then it was my turn, and then we headed to college, where I narrated this story to a bunch of guys who all scratched their heads later and then I headed back home and fell asleep.

At 3 AM, the next morning, I shouted with roof-threatening levels of sound- “Yeahhhhhhhh..!!! I won ‘The Bhaskars’ …. Yeahhhh..!!” which made Roshan waste another jug of water.

29 comments:

  Saket Ranjan

February 24, 2009 at 3:18 PM

I am scratching my head at the moment. And now I am leaving.. Bye

  Dr Riya

February 24, 2009 at 3:29 PM

He.. He.. Lol.. Very funny.. The dream you had.. And bhaskerspr is funny too.. But you know iur always what to fear the most in reality or the thing you want to most is what one sees in the dreams.. So i can interpret that you love your girlfriend very much.. Thats why you had both dreams in which you felt she was goin away from you.. Anywyays god bless and let your dreams come true.. Let you get the indian version of oscars some day..

  Arjun

February 24, 2009 at 3:37 PM

@Saket
All the best dude..!!

@Riya

I don't know abt wat u said... but Thanks.. hehe

  nan

February 24, 2009 at 3:47 PM

Hail RJ anna the winner of Bhaskar :P

  jack

February 24, 2009 at 4:34 PM

hey congrates you just won bhaskar... yesterday it was rehman sir with oscar, now you with bhaskar.. we really are bunch of talented people lolzzz
hey nice one dude

cheers,
:)

  Pretty Me!!

February 24, 2009 at 8:15 PM

glad to see you blog again :) missed them... n cngrats fr the bhaskars !

  Tara

February 24, 2009 at 9:19 PM

Another Indian makes us proud! Lol! :P I really pity Roshan, poor fellow, he has to suffer your dreams! But on a serious note, great stuff, ok am tired of saying this each time, so I'll try something different. Wonderful stuff. Ok, not too different! :D

  Thoorika

February 24, 2009 at 10:17 PM

Too much of oscars i say !! I pity your friend Roshan!!! tell him that my sympathies are with him !! :D

  Arjun

February 24, 2009 at 10:48 PM

@nandini

Bow... bow... ( i mean the i bow down.. not the bow bow of a dog)

@Jack

hehe.. Thanks .
but now i'm feeling how stupid and silly this post sounds... sorry guys

  Arjun

February 24, 2009 at 10:50 PM

@Prats

hehe... Hey Prats.. ur always welcome.. ;)

@Tara

This time i dont deserve it... The market prices of my hand is going down... Someone help..!!


@Thoorika

damn with that fellow..!! who cares..?? :P

  Mahesh Sindbandge

February 24, 2009 at 11:13 PM

That was really funny..just like some joke shared from five point someone..:)
good going buddy..
keep it up

  Arjun

February 25, 2009 at 9:59 AM

@Mahesh

Thanks bro..!!

Trying to write humourously i sometimes become too silly.... I dont realize that when i post it... but then... in a day or two i start feeling wat kind of a stupid story i've written... I'm feelin tat way with this...

But if u liked it... hehe.. enjoy..!!

Cheers..!!
Arjun

  ~ Dip ~

February 25, 2009 at 1:05 PM

so what did you wear at the bhaskars!!!

  spicymist

February 25, 2009 at 7:34 PM

hey another awesome post man. rad on!!

  ROFLOL

February 25, 2009 at 7:50 PM

my name in itself tells u about my state after reading ur post....but hats off to roshan for being such a patient listener......:P

  Shimmer

February 25, 2009 at 8:15 PM

err.... ur dreams are like mega serials.. its jus thtat.. 'to be continued' is in the form of a jug of water :P loll

i like the part where u wear sunglasses in utter darkness :P how rajni-kanth/vijay-kanth like :D:D:P

  яノςんム

February 25, 2009 at 8:33 PM

typical Arjun style!!

lolz dude u always make my stomach hurt laughing :D

cheers!!

  Arjun

February 26, 2009 at 11:13 AM

@Dipti

White shirt, white dhothi....
A stamp on my forehead..... Sunglasses, 'BATA' chappal..... wat else u wanna know uh?? :P

@spicymist

Thanks yar..!! :)

  Arjun

February 26, 2009 at 11:15 AM

@ROFLOL

Super name bro..!! ;)

Thanks for that.... n balls to Roshan..!! damn..

@Shimmer

yeah..Rajni style..!! Flip the glasses *shik shik shik* and throw it aside.... yeppidi.. ;)
My life's only like a mega serial.. hehe :P

Thanks :)

  Arjun

February 26, 2009 at 11:16 AM

@Richa

is it so..!! By now u must have known tat i'm a social servant... hehe

Thanks yar..!!

Cheers..!!
Arjun

  ~ Dip ~

February 26, 2009 at 1:06 PM

lol are the bhaskars organized by simi garewal... white dress code!

  Arjun

February 26, 2009 at 3:21 PM

@Dipti

hehe.. Yeah..kind of!!

White widows.. ;)

  Aarthi

February 26, 2009 at 7:47 PM

Arjun...
I'll tell ya my comment on this work of yours on gtalk!

Meet me there for sure...

Cheers


*PEACE*

  uchiha teee

February 27, 2009 at 4:19 AM

hehe the ending was uncanny :D and a bit cheesy though.I guess you watch A LOT of movies :D. another vivid description of yours


T

  Arjun

February 27, 2009 at 9:30 AM

@Aarthi

*biting my nails*

@Tejesh

Yeah... Forced to watch a lot of South indian movies.. :( .. U can see the effect..!!

  sunny_raju

February 27, 2009 at 8:55 PM

So many followers of ur blog
shows ur blog's worth,
hey nominate ur blog in fiction category gor indiblogger awards
follow this link
http://nom2008.indibloggies.org/
good luck

  Akansha Agrawal

February 28, 2009 at 11:37 AM

I can't stop grinning and laughing... :D

  lachu

March 31, 2009 at 7:21 AM

dude...seriously
u hav to stop watchin so many tamil,hindi,telugu movies man...
anywayzzz if was funny..ironical description of indian movies n youngsters at same time
hehehehehe
cheers :)
lachu

  Priyanka

April 14, 2009 at 11:07 PM

The bhaskars!!! Lol!!
D story…man…total filmi ishtyle!! N den next train to jump infront! Lol
Good funny post! :D